|From Mt Kosciusko|
You love me back.
|From Christmas lights 2009|
In a high school class of 119, there is no great honor in winning Homecoming Queen. Who was she competing with? Evelyn Anders needed a win from a larger pool. Miss Chick? Everyone would say she had the hometown advantage. She cast her view more widely.**
She flat-out refused to consider even entering the queen pageant for the Eaton Pork Festival. Miss Piggy? Queen Sow? Similarly, she ruled out Bradford’s Pumpkin Show- too easy for the comments to turn ghastly.
Annie Oakley Days. Only at the last minute did Evelyn understand that SHOOTING was part of a winning package… and that didn’t include shooting the team that was setting up the next target. Eliminated.
Minster’s Oktoberfest. Her place in the finalist group was snatched away thanks to some unspeakable accident involving massive quantities of beer.
Nearing the end of senior year came the big county-wide senior dance at Rossburg Chevrolet: The Rossburg-a-go-go. Certain she would win, Evelyn was crushed when a ballot box stuffing scandal (her words, not mine) awarded the price to the bitch (her words, not mine)from Russia. No prize. No tiara. No Chevette.
So, Evelyn deigned to enter the Miss Chick Contest. Designed her poultry themed dress. Practiced her wave. Arranged with her uncle, the squirrelly one, to borrow his convertible. And………
Maybe she won. (Still it was a year with a lot of hate and the win a cheap, no pun intended, hometown honor. Everyone said that!)
Then, again, maybe her crown was pulled at the last minute when it was revealed that she was far too closely related to the very vociferous group of radical vegans who were at the time of the crowing, defacing the world’s largest omelet.
|From Singles 2011|
SPITTING IS UNACCEPTABLE.
Bus operators are now equipped with DNA kits to assist with the apprehension of offenders.
|From Singles 2011|
"In these last staggering minutes of his life my father did not speak, he did not speak to me as if in the urgency of the moment he'd forgotten me, a kind of oblivion had washed over his soul, his hard-as-steel soul and he'd forgotten me, he'd forgotten his wife whom he had so desperately summoned to his side. He'd forgotten his family, his life that had gone bad. For it was his secret knowledge that death is easy, death is so much easier than life. ..I saw Daddy crouching, his shoulders hunched and his head lowered, now his face was turned from me and I could not see if he was smiling, I would never see Daddy's face again and must surrender him now, in his shaky right hand the revolver to be identified in the media as a .38-caliber Smith & Wesson in the illegal possession of Edward Diehl, I saw Daddy step confidently into that blinding light and lift this gun as if about to fire it in a seemingly spontaneous mocking gesture that would be the final gesture of his life."