Saturday, November 08, 2008

Petition to Barak O'Bama Re. First Dog

From singles 2


I can be ready at a moment's notice.

I have a history of political activism.

I have a history of inclusiveness. I will sleep in every bed with every family member on each night. I will share your chair with you - unless it is too warm. Then, I'll move.

You need not worry who will walk me in inclement weather. I don't like it. I have perfected the 15 second pee.

I understand that Malia has allergies. So do I. We can share my antihistamines.

I understand HOPE. I practice HOPE each day, all day long. I HOPE someone will throw the ball. I HOPE someone will chase me when I have the ball. I HOPE that each trip outside will include me. I HOPE (a lot) that someone will drop food on the floor.

I can help you house break your children. They will learn to keep their clothes off the floor and put their toys away when they are done playing.

For no extra kibble, I will keep your floors licked clean of crumbs and tidbits.

I can help you screen visitors. Every guest will get a thorough sniff and a good bark.

If you make better decisions than these liberal yahoos I live with, I will entertain your dinner guests by jumping up and down repeatedly for bites from the table.

I have experience with living in foreign lands and meeting both non-Americans (Australians, Swiss, Germans) and un-Americans (Cleveland Heights residents and gay and lesbian people).

"Psst- Zelda. McCain did not win. George W. is leaving the White House."

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